The Results of the 20 lb WRC! Week 1, Day 3 of the KWC!

I set myself an ambitious goal to lose 20 lbs in 7 days so that I wouldn't be able to fuck up. I didn't log my food on two of the days, because I was playing tennis and video games with my cousin and other things, but 4 of the 5 days I did log my food, I did well. I averaged 633.2 calories on those 5 days which is okay. If It weren't for that one day, it would be significantly lower. Oh well. I exercised every day, doing aerobic step-ups, the killer workout challenge, tennis, and walking.

Now for the moment we've all been waiting for(at least I have!) I weighed in today at exactly 267lbs. So I lost 13lbs in 7 days. I know I was aiming for 20, but I'm okay with 13. I'm assuming half of that if not more is water weight, because how can someone lose that much in a week? Either way, I need to lose more,

I have two days before the birthday party, 3 if you count today. Since I may have to eat food, hopefully I can get out of it, but if not, I've decided to fast for 72 hours. So far, I am 19 hours and 40 minutes in(7-13-11, 7:40pm.) That's for refrence for me later.

I've yet to do week 1, day 3 of the Killer Workout Challenge. It consists of 250 jumping jacks, 40 crunches, 40 squats, and 4 push-ups. When I'm done with this entry, I'll do it.

I'm getting anxious for Reno and the day before it. How can I lose weight eating my grandmothers cooking? She'll probably make spaghetti or shredded beef tacos. If she makes spaghetti, I'll skip the rolls and eat tons of whatever vegetable will be there, probably broccoli, with no salt or butter of course! The tacos on the other hand... I might just put a miniscule amount of meat on a miniature tortilla and put loads of lettuce, no cheese. If I have one, I hope they don't get suspicious. I'll tell them I'm losing weight. If my mother asks me, maybe she'll think one is enough? Thinking back to when I was little, I would have 2 tacos. As I got older, I would have 3, then, 4, and then 5! No wonder I got so lardy!

Anyways, I'll weigh myself right before I leave and make it my goal to maintain that weight over vacation. Then I'll lose tons when I get back.

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I'm just replying to a comment I got, because I stupidly can't figure out how to leave comments. >.<

The comment was: Felix said...

You really think eating 200 calories in a day is "the healthy way"? And your mom agrees?

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        Dear Felix,
                I know it's too few calories, but I am eating healthy as far as food in general goes. My mother believes I am eating more than I am(1200-1500 calories each day.) It's just that dieting regularly never worked for me and the results were to slow, aka, 1 lb in a week is not a good loss for someone of my size. If I'm not losing at least, and I mean at the very LEAST 3 lbs each week, I'm not happy.

So to answer your questions, I don't think 200 calories in a day is "the healthy way" and my mother doesn't know, therefore doesn't agree.



~Raven

Day 7/7 of the 20 lb WRC! Week 1, Day 2 of the Killer Workout Challenge!

Today was the last day of the 20 lb Weight Reversal Challenge and I sadly don't feel that I've lost 20lbs this week. I guess I'll see tomorrow morning, err this morning, later... It's 1:30am and I haven't slept yet, so I'll weigh in whenever the heck I wake up!
I averaged 564 calories each day this week which is good. It would have been a million times lower, but I stayed at my cousin's house for 4 days. He has an amazing metabolism and eats out maybe twice a day and although I got out of eating with him in those 4 days, on the last day at his house, I couldn't get out of going to Baskin Robbins. I figured what I got would be 700-800 calories and that since I had only had a glass of pulp free orange juice that day, it wouldn't be the end of the world. It wasn't 700-800 calories...It was double at 1,430 fucking calories! Suffice to say, it was the end of the world and I am just starting to get over it. A word to the wise, NEVER under any circumstances get Baskin Robbins!
My friend on Facebook, Edsurreal came up with a 4 week workout plan and I am naming it: The Killer Workout Challenge. I did the first day, which consisted of 333 jumping jacks, 60 crunches, 60 squats, and 6 push ups. Let me tell you it was hell. Day 2 is 300 jumping jacks, 50 crunches, 50 squats, and 5 push ups, a little easier than day 1, but still difficult. It's the jumping jacks, doing 100 jumping jacks without stopping is hard enough, but doing 300 is another story. I know how hard it is, so I've already completed the squats and push ups for day 2. I'll do the crunches when I wake up and the jumping jacks half an hour after I take my diet pills(they have caffeine.)
I have a birthday party to attend on the 16th and am starting to freak. What if they force feed me cake or something? Well, I could bend the truth a little and say I'm trying to eat more healthily. That's what I'll do. But, I'm going to my grandparents's house on the 17th and am leaving to Reno on the 18th as well and I don't know what I'm going to do. The good thing is there's an exercise room and the pool at the Nugget is amazing, it has a waterfall, is huge, is heated, and there's a jucuzzi(spell?) which means I can burn loads of calories by swimming and utilizing equipment I don't have at home. The bad news is, there will be a lot of temptation there and I can't bring my own vegetables and things. I may bring an apple or two though and try to stick with black coffee from Starbucks. I think that I'll have to eat out at least once there, because we have to do everything as a family blah blah blah and my mother may inform them I'm dieting again and to watch me.
Pretty girls are made of coffee, smokes, and cold diet cokes.

~Raven

Just another update.

I talked to my mother about losing weight the healthy way and she supports me. Her exact words were, "If you want to lose weight, that's great, but if I think for 1 second you have eating issues again, you're going to have your computer, cell phone, and treadmill taken away."

I agreed with her, but I don't know how well I can hide it. I have broccoli, carrots, and sugar snap peas steaming on the stove as I write this and that's dinner. Half for my mother and half for me. That's only 40 calories a piece, but I'm putting seasoning and butter on hers, plain for me. I know I won't eat all of mine, so todays intake will be 1.5 plums, 8 oz of juice, 2 diet pills, and 1/4 of a bag of Eating Right Broccoli Stir Fry. 195 calories, 46 carbs, 0 grams of fat, 40 miligrams of sodium, and 40 grams of sugar. Not too shabby.

I still haven't weighed myself, but am weighing in on the morning of this Wednesday. Tuesday is my last day of the 20 lb Weight Reversal Challenge and I'm kind of nervous. I mean is it even possible to lose 20 lbs in 7 days without doing some major exercise? The Biggest Loser does it, but I'm not sure if normal obese people can. I guess we'll see. I'm really hoping I make it and if not than I hope I've lost at least 10 lbs.

I'm going to go eat dinner and then go to bed. goodnight everyone!

~Raven

Day 1/7 of the 20 lb Weight Reversal Challenge!

One of my ana friends on Facebook came up with the name for me. I was successful today, but I feel like I should have exercised more.

Totals	252	51	1	205	32	0
Daily Goal	500	80	3	1,500	116	0
Remaining	328	29	2	1,295	84	0
	Calories	Carbs	Fat	Sodium	Sugar	Trans Fat

I did pretty good food wise, but did have 8 oz of low cal Gatorade. Oh well. I burned 80.2 calories on the treadmill in 15 minutes and 12 seconds. I don't mind walking or anything, but it's so boring and repetitive. I wish I could have gotten an ellyptical. I'll get one as soon as I can afford it.

My goals for tomorrow are to stay under 500 calories, drink 64 oz of water and tea, burn 100 calories on the treadmill, and to resist all bad foods that might tempt me at my cousins house.

I can't get out of one thing tomorrow though. My cousin and I are going to the thai restaraunt I've talked about previously. I'll order ice water and duck noodle soup. I won't eat the duck in it and I will definately skip getting frozen yogurt. The problem is that I'm not 100% sure of the calorie count in the soup. I think it's around 300 calories and 3 grams of fat if I don't eat the duck and only have a little bit of broth. It's not TOO bad, but I am sort of bending the rules of the 20 lb Weight Reversal Challenge. I'm only supposwed to have fruit, veggies, and 1 frozen  yogurt a day... There isn't anything I can do to get out of it though. My cousin has been asking to go with me there for 2 weeks and I have been ignoring him.........

Wish me luck.

~Raven

Oh no...

I broke my fast after 50 hours and 11 minutes and forced myself to not check my weight after. I went out to eat and had maybe 150 calories(veggies, 1 oz of salmon, and 3 small bites of salad.) I didn't binge, but I am freaking out a lot now. My mother commented on me not eating a lot when we went out and I can tell she's catching on. The only good thing is that she recently got a job. This means she can't watch what I eat, or don't eat all day. I think she'll watch me some what while she's here, so I came up with a diet that will help me lose weight fast and make sure that if she confronts me I can tell her everything I've eaten. I'll eat fruits and veggies all day with ice water and ice tea and once a day go to Yogurt Time. It's a fat free low carb frozen yogurt shop. I'll get their smallest size and either get it plain, or with fruit on top. This will satisfy me and should satisfy my mother. This will be easy.
I need to use my treadmill more though. I'm thinking I can burn 80+ calories each day on it to start and then once I get better at it 200+, and then 400+. I am not by any means a fit person and that's why I'm starting off really slow. Even if I don't use the treadmill, I burn 1,700+ calories each day just by doing nothing, but if I want to lose weight fast, then I have to try hard.

Sadly I have my TOM, time of the month to those who don't know. I feel more fat than usual with it.... I hope it goes away soon!

I'm not sure how much I weigh right now, but I was 280lbs. With this 500 calories or less of fruit, veggies, frozen yogurt, water, ice tea, burning 80+ calories each day on the treadmill, and taking my green tea fat burner diet pills, I should lose weight quickly, at least a pound per day.

My goal is to lose 20lbs in 1 week. If I have a big goal like that, then I will not be able to mess up. I haven't been 260 pounds in a few months. I'll let you all know how it goes.

~Raven

Calories	80	Sodium	85 mg
Total Fat	0 g	Potassium	0 mg
Saturated	0 g	Total Carbs	18 g
Polyunsaturated	0 g	Dietary Fiber	3 g
Monounsaturated	0 g	Sugars	6 g
Trans	0 g	Protein	4 g
Cholesterol	5 mg

420 calories is a lot of vegetables and fruit.

Day 2

Yay, I was able to get out of not going to the Thai place. :)

40 hours fasting so far at 1pm 7-2-11

The first day was easy, but now I'm hungry and didn't sleep at all last night...I read not sleeping at least 6 hours each night increases hunger and slows your metabolic rate... I'm gonna go get some ice tea and tough it out, maybe watch Kate's Secret, or A Secret Between Friends again. I've seen A Secret Between Friends 30ish times. Yes I know everyones lines. Lol.

On a sadder note, today would have been our 3 month anniversary...

~Raven

Day 1

I was successful with not eating today, I burned 500 calories on my treadmill, and I drank more than 8 glasses of water.

Water-0 calories
Tea-0 calories
Slim Quick-0 calories
Pills-0 calories

I've been fasting for 24 hours and 19 minutes now and hope I fast for a long time. I didn't weigh myself today and don't plan on it until I start eating again, that way when I see how much I've lost, it will be a suprise. Not weighing in is going to be one of the hardest things ever and I hope I can not do it. Tomorrow, I am going to a Thai restaraunt with my father and cousin and I usually get rice and beef or duck noodle soup. Since I'm fasting and all, I am getting ice water, no rice, and maybe beef or duck noodle soup. I can get it and just have a little bit of the broth. I might tell my cousin I'm fasting and give him my soup, but who knows. This is going to be a huge temptation and I need to stay focused. If I end up eating anything while I'm there, I will force myself to burn 1,000 calories on my treadmill, which is more than I've ever burned at one time on it. I need to succeed at this, so that when I go back to school on August 17th, my ex sees that I've lost weight.

I didn't eat today, and I'm not gonna eat tomorrow.

~Raven

Months Later...

I had started dating a good looking guy that I had been crushing on for months and felt loved and accepted immediately. THAT was my downfall. I trusted him. I thought he felt love for me as I did for him and we seemed to have everything in common. We were together almost 3 months and I gained some weight while I was with him, but I was happy. I was only weighing myself maybe once a week and hadn't really been watching what I ate. I thought that if he accepted me enough at 257lbs to go out with me, then he wouldn't mind if I gained a tiny bit. I told him everything, even about my anorexic past, the cutting I used to and still do sometimes, and anything else you can imagine. I told him my highest weight and how much I weighed. He said that he was proud of me for losing weight, but that he didn't support me losing weight the "ana" way. I didn't realize it, but on almost all our dates, we ate bad food and we didn't do anything like walk together. I didn't weigh myself for about a month, but my pants felt really tight and I could barely button them, so I decided to weigh in. I was 277lbs! I called him on the phone crying and he said to meet him at the park close to his house so we could "talk". When I got there, he was already there and I ran to him and hugged him and he hugged me back and told me to tell him what was wrong. I told him my weight and how horrible and gross I felt. You know what he said? "You should feel horrible and you are gross!" I backed up and looked at him wide eyed and he started laughing. One of his friends that I didn't know well came from behind a tree with a video camera. He had taped the whole thing and was laughing with my boyfriend. I didn't know what to say, except "What is this?!?!" When he told me that he never loved or even liked me and that he was dared to ask me out I felt more tears stream down my face and my chest fell. His plan had been to make me gain even more weight and to make me feel horrible. He is a monster and I hate him and I can't believe I fell for it... I ran home crying the whole time. I locked myself in my room and my mother tried to get me to open my door, but I didn't. How could I tell her what happened? This whole thing happened 2 days ago and I have only left my room to use the restroom and eat. I ate a lot and gained 3lbs. I'm 280lbs now. I refuse to gain anymore weight, I will never be over 280lbs and I will never go back to my highest weight. 5 and a half hours ago at 9pm June 30th, I started a fast. I don't know how long it will last, but I will try my best to get down to where I was when I first started dating him. 257lbs. 23lbs is what I need to lose as fast as possible. After that, who knows? Maybe I'll fast for a long time, or become ana again. I'm scared as much as I hate to admit it. Ana ruined my life for years and it was so horrible gaining all this weight, but I was my happiest when I was ana and I am my happiest when I see the number on the scale go down. Even if I only lose .2lbs, I feel good knowing that I'm thinner than I was. I'm going to lose weight, I'm going to look sexy, and I'm going to be happy. I want my ex boyfriend to see what he's missing. I want him to wish he would have never done that horrible thing to me. I want him to feel as horrible as I did and still do.

I will do this!

I want to be thinner tomorrow than I was today.

~Raven

The 12 Week Challenge Day 2: Success

Today was really easy at school and home, but I am a bit hungry now. However, I refuse to eat after 6 pm, so I'm fine. :)

In other news, I finished my exercise at school, which is awesome. Walking to and from classes and walking 2 miles during physical education really helps to burn the calories fast. Also, we played kick ball, but I'm not counting that, because it seems like it wouldn't burn much. In total I walked 50 minutes, which I know isn't a whole lot, but it's a start. I just wish I had my treadmill already.

I ordered it over a week ago and it still isn't here. :/

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Tuesday 2-26-11 Day 2:

Breakfast: 1 Blueberry Bagel w/ 1 Tbsp of Strawberry Cream Cheese and a Grape Propel Zero-300 Calories

Snack: 1 Small Chocolate Milk-100 Calories

Lunch: 1 Apple and 4 Water Crackers-109 Calories

Snack: 2 Pieces of 5 Gum-10 Calories

Dinner: 1 Cup of Cottage Cheese-160 Calories

Exercise: 50 Minutes of Walking-381 Calories

BMR: 2180 Calories

Total: -1882 Calories

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School was okay today. I usually dread it with every fibre of my being, but not today, for whatever reason. I was fairly tired, but other than that...

Well, I have some english homework to get to.

~Raven

The 12 Week Challenge

I can not believe I haven't posted in 8 days. I was at my grandparents for three of those days, but still.

It's impossible to fast or eat like an anorextic at their house, but I still tried my best to eat healthy. I ate fairly well, stayed under 1200 calories a day, but then there was the day I was leaving. We baked sugar cookies, blueberry muffins, and ate them. Okay not all of them. I had 1/2 a sugar cookie and 3 blueberry muffins. O.o

I thought for sure I would have gained weight, but I am now....duh duh duh duhhhh...270 lbs. So I've lost 9 lbs in 10 days. Uhmmm, not too bad.
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Even so, I began a 12 week weight loss challenge today. This is what I wrote in my notebook:

I am beginning a 12 week weight loss challenge. I will stick, to this challenge. I will not drink soda on this challenge. I will not eat fast food on this challenge. I will ride my bike 3 times a week on this challenge. I will walk for 30 minutes a day on this challenge. I will stay under 1400 calories a day on this challenge. I will keep my house clean on this challenge. I will save up my money on this challenge. I will not drink alcohol on this challenge. I will do all my homework on this challenge. And I will not swear on this challenge.

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I wrote that, because my mother reads my notebook. I plan on staying wayyy under 1400 calories. Here's Day 1's plan:

Monday 4-25-11 Day 1:

Breakfast: 1 Homemade Blueberry Muffin and 1 Tbsp of Light Strawberry Cream Cheese-235 Calories

Snack: Hot Green Tea and 1 Apple-91 Calories

Lunch: 1 4” Veggie Delight on Wheat Bread w/ No Cheese Subway-154 Calories

Snack: 4 Mini Cadbury Eggs-160 Calories

Dinner: Tilapia, Salad, Light Italian Dressing, 1 Baked Potato, and 1 Tbsp of Light Sour Cream-268 Calories

Exercise: 30 Minutes of Bike Riding and 30 Minutes of Walking- -495 Calories

BMR: -2180 Calories

Total: -1767 Calories

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I know that's kind of a lot of calories, but my mum watches me now. She's like a hawk. She makes sure I eat and she's wary when I go to the restroom afterwards. As long as I lose 5 lbs a week, I will be happy.

Oh yeah, Monday is now my official weigh in day.

My goal is to be 265lbs one week from now. Any less and I will fast for 24 hours.

Wait that actually seems like a good idea. Stick to this 12 week challenge, plan on losing 5 lbs a week, and then every week I don't lose 5 lbs, fast for 24 hours. Yay, I have a good plan now. If I stick to the scheduled weight loss, then I should be 210 lbs when this challenge is over. That would be cool. Lose 60 pounds in 3 months. I'd still be a pig, but I'd be a smaller pig and I'd be at least a size 14.

Yes a size 14 is huge, but I am a size 18 right now and at 291 lbs, I was a size 20.

School will be out at the end of this challenge; it will be the middle of summer vacation. I'm actually really excited, because I know I can stick to this and I can't wait until the end of this challenge. I can't wait for the end of this week even. I can't wait to be under 200 lbs!

Well, I'm gonna go eat an apple and down a water bottle.

Adios, Sayonara, Ciao, Bye bye. :)

~Raven

Fast - Day 2: Success

My fast lasted exactly 49 hours and 11 minutes, before I had some tilapia and salad. Not too bad for me ending a fast. My goal is to eat healthy food this week, to burn off 500+ calories every day, and to stay under 1000 calories. I know this isn't really normal for me, but someone commented on me not eating. I don't want anyone to think I'm converting to my old habits. I have to seem normal. Just a normal teenaged girl who want to lose weight in a healthy non-anorexic way. Well, I need to go to sleep, it's midnight.

My Day 2 intake was:
                            2 oz of ice tea : 0 calories
                            Shaved Ice : 0 calories
                            Some of My Suplements : 2 calories
                            4 oz of Grilled Tilapia : 90 calories
                            Salad w/ vinegar : 51 calories

My Day 2 exercise was non-existant. :(

Total calories : 143
~Raven

Fast - Day 1: Success

Day 1 of my fast was great and I'm thinking being 279 lbs was temporary-not-real weight, because my scale says that I'm 272 lbs this morning. On any of my fasts, the most I lost in one day was 4 lbs, not 7 lbs. Either way though, I'm excited to be close to the 260's again. The only reason being that in the 260's, I'm closer to the 250's and I haven't been there in a long time.

It's been 39 hours and 30 minutes since my fast started and I'm not hungry yet. :0 This is awesome and the fact that I have a cold keeps my family from thinking I'm deliberately not eating. At the very least, I will fast for 48 hours, but I really want to keep going. I feel amazing when I'm fasting.

My Day 1 intake was:
                            33.8 oz of Water : 0 calories
                            2 Slimquick Packets : 0 calories
                            1.5 Propel Zero's : 0 calories
                            My Suplements : 32 calories

My Day 1 exercise was:
                            50 crunches : -10 calories
                            20 minutes of walking : -103 calories
                            5 minutes of yoga (Don't ask) : -26 calories

Total calories : -107!!

~Raven

Once Again, the Plan is Changing

I don't know why I keep changing my plan, but I am, so whatever. The old plan was to eat under 1200 calories every day this week, but I realized that eating normally was too difficult and made me feel like a complete failure.

Did you know I was 279 pounds a little over an hour ago? Just kill me now. How is that even possible. How can someone gain 6+ pounds in 4 days of normal eating? I ate under 1200 calories and exercised!

I don't ever want to be 280 pounds again, so that is why the plan is changing. I began a fast at 7:00 pm and I am 1 hour and 50 minutes in. I really hope this fast lasts for at LEAST the weekend. The only plus I get for eating normally for 4 days, is that my metabolism is most likely back to normal.
Well, anyways, remember how I said I play World of Warcraft? It turns out it's a plus for weight loss. It distracts me from eating. :D I sorta freaked out when I accidently fed my character though. I feel stupid, it's not like she'll get fat.

xoxo

-Raven

Ana Boot camp is no more...For now...

Today was one of the worst days of my life. The 4 hours of star testing was grueling. Plus, I forgot to have breakfast. You try doing 4 hours of difficult testing without having food for 32ish hours. It was horrible. I've decided to put off on doing the ABC, at least for a little while.

Because I know I'm most likely going to eat semi normally (Under 1200 calories) for a week, I've been thinking about fasting afterwards. I'm not sure how long it would last, but I would aim for at least a week. Being the pig I am, in 1 week of fasting, I could lose 7-18 pounds. That would be great, because I'm anxious to be under 260. So it's settled, eat semi normally this week and then fast for 1-4 weeks.

I have more star testing tomorrow and its 11 pm, so I'm gonna go catch some Z's.

Z...z...z...

Please God, don't let me have a gain tomorrow. Please, please, please!

-Raven

Ana Boot Camp: Day 8 - 400 calories (NOT REALLY)

So here's the deal, Star Testing begins tomorrow and I need to eat on those days. If I don't, than my brain will be too sleepy, hehehe. What I did was switch the fasting day (Day : 10) with today (Day : 8), so that I can eat breakfast on all of the testing days.

I fasted successfully today and cleaned my room, but other than that, I didn't really do much. I played World of Warcraft (Yes I am that much of a geek) for maybe 40 minutes and I made my mom breakfast. I made her a cheese and onion omelet. I know what your thinking, "Isn't making food when you’re fasting just asking for disaster?" Well it's not. I really enjoy cooking and am going to start doing it more often.

Food:
        1 Grape Propel Zero : 0 calories
        1 Glass of Shaved Ice : 0 calories
        My Supplements : 11 calories ( I didn't take them all.) :(
       
Exercise:
        35 minutes of cleaning my room : -178 calories
       
Total calories : -167!

"An imperfect body reflects an imperfect person."

~Raven

Ana Boot Camp: Day 7 - 300 calories

Today was okay. I saw Insidious with my friend and my cousin. We went to Subway and my friend asked why I got such a tiny sandwich. Inside I was LMAO, because that sandwich was huge!!!! I was thinking, "Why the hell did you get such a big sandwich?" She got a 6" BLT and it looked good, but also really big. After Subway, we went to Starbucks and she got a Frappacino. I almost orgasmed okay not really, but I remember when I would get one of those each day. No wonder I got so big. She somehow convinced me to buy a cake pop that I thought was around 100 calories. Just to be safe, I only ate like 0.7 of it. It was more than 100 calories. Geez, I'm never getting one of those again. I just got water at the theatre and my friend got a small pop corn and sour patch kids. Fatty! She's thinner than me. I'm the fucking fatty. :'(

I bought a shaved ice machine today. Best thing ever! I can have snow cones without the flavoring. Orange flavoring came with it though. 150 calories per serving! I'm going to fast from now (4 P.M.) until I feel like stopping. I'm going for at least 20 hours though. Hmm… so that I stick to the ABC, I'm going to have some flavoring. Yes I know, BAD! Tomorrow is a 400 calorie day though and I want to stick to this as close as possible. So I will have 2 servings of the Orange stuff. I can have tons of shaved ice though and it counts as water! xD AWESOME!!!!! now getting 8 glasses of water per day will be easy. You know what I recently found out though? You are supposed to have 1 oz of water per pound you weigh every day! That would be like 34 glasses per day. I guess I need to buy more ice. Well anyways, I should really go study. I have Star Testing starting Monday. Ugh.

Food:
        Sugar Free Green Tea (cold) : 2 calories
        Starbucks Tiramisu Cake Pop (0.7 of it) : 119 calories
        Subway 4" Veggie Delight w/ No Cheese on Wheat Bread  : 147 calories
        All of my Supplements/Diet Pills : 32 calories
        Shaved Ice : 0 calories

Exercise:
        20 minutes of walking : -103 calories
        30 minutes of difficult cycling : -339 calories

Total calories : -142 calories!!! xD

"Only I can let myself fail"

~Raven

Ana Boot Camp: Day 6 - 200 calories

I'm too exhausted to type today, sorry.

Food:
        Propel Zero : 0 calories
        Sugar Free Red Bull : 10 calories
        Subway 4" Veggie Delight w/ No Cheese on Wheat Bread  : 164 calories
       
Exercise:
        49 minutes of slow walking : -208 calories
        7 minutes of fast walking : -73 calories

Total calories : -92 calories! :)

"Eat to live, don't live to eat."

~Raven

Official Weigh in 1

Well it's Saturday, my official weigh in day. Today will be day 6 of the ABC diet, so it's been 5 days since I've written my weight in this blog. I woke up at 8:30 A.M this morning, used the restroom, and checked my weight. I always check my weight in my bra and panties (Sorry if that's too much info.) I had been 280 pound and am excited to say that I am now 270 pounds! Yay, 10 pounds in 5 days! This is great, considering I was shooting for 5 pounds in 5 days. I am still a fat cow, but now maybe I'm not quite as fat… maybe? Well, I guess I'm going to go take two more pictures of me, as I did before, and then we will see. I see no difference. :(

 

Ana Boot Camp: Day 5 - 100 calories

Today was a good day. I was successful in my diet and exercise, having a deficit calorie day! :D I'm kind of hungry now, but if I end up having something, it will be water, or grape propel zero. I don't want to have anymore calories today. I just returned home from Wal-Mart and I bought some pills; Green Tea Fat Burner, Fish Oil, Hair Skin and Nails, and Green Tea Extract. I've used both of the green tea pills before and they work beautifully. I usually take 2-3 of each per day. Now I'm going to be taking 14 pills a day. Geez. That's a lot. Whatever it takes to lose weight though. The only problem is that, unless I eat with them, I usually get nauseous. I don't always puke, but I feel really sick. I don't even care anymore. There is a problem. Tomorrow is a 200 calorie day, but my grandparents are coming to town. They're taking my cousin and me out to lunch. O.o I doubt I can find something for that little. I will get something healthy though and maybe have half of it? Hmm... How about this. I burn off double everything I consume while on this diet (Except for on weekends) and if I eat calories I'm not supposed to (such as food with my grandparents I burn off double whatever it is. For example. Tomorrow's a 200 calorie day. I eat 450 calories and burn off 1200 calories. That's a lot, but I can do it. I will do this hardcore bitches! ^.^

Food:
        8.4 oz Sugar Free Red Bull : 10 calories
        1 Grape Propel Zero : 0 calories
        3 Pieces of 5 Gum : 15 calories
        2 Bottles of Water : 0 calories
        1 Children's vitamin : 5 calories

Exercise:
        3 minutes of running : -72 calories
        20 minutes of slow walking : -104 calories
        15 minutes of fast walking : -156 calories

Total calories : - 302!!!

I want to be thinner tomorrow than what I was today.

“I don't care if it hurts I want to have control, I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul.”

~Raven

Ana Boot Camp: Day 4 - 400 calories

Isn't she cute? Hehe. Here's how it went today. I had only liquid until after school, when my cousin and my mother decided they wanted In-N-Out Burger. They drove there (I was with them) and my mother got a cheese burger w/ fries and a medium coke and my cousin got a double cheeseburger w/ fries and an ice tea. They were looking at me weird, so I ordered a cheeseburger w/no onions, a fry, and an ice tea. I didn't eat the fries; I fed them to the birdies at the park. :) The burger on the other hand, I ate the tomato, lettuce, ketchup, and bread. I gave the cheesy burger to our puppy dog. I wish I hadn't eaten that bread, but there's only so much I can get away with.

Food:
        1/3 Strawberry Banana Smoothie : 61 calories
        1/2 Grape Propel Zero : 0 calories
        In-N-Out burger (no onions, no cheese, and no meat) : 288 calories
        Ice Tea (no sugar) : 0 calories

Exercise:
        40 minutes of walking : -208 calories
        
Total calories : 141

I hope I do better tomorrow.

“I wanna be size 0!”

~Raven

Ana Boot Camp: Day 3 - 300 calories

Today was okay-ish. I fit in the calories, but I dunno, I just feel weird. :/ I hate myself for having that 1/2 Mac Wrap. Mc Donald’s signifies weakness. My weight has been going down each day though and as long as it goes down some tomorrow, I'll be somewhat happy. Hmm, not that this is related to the ABC or anything, but I got 100 % on a really difficult geography test. :) Whenever I'm dieting/losing weight regularly, I always do better in school and feel better about myself.

Food:
        1/3 Iced Latte (Starbucks) : 26 calories
        1/2 Mac Wrap (Mc Donald’s) : 165 calories
        Apple : 60 calories

Exercise:
        10 minutes of walking : -52 calories
          
Total calories : 199

Oh yeah, sorry about posting the posts a day late each time, I pretty much crash when I get home from school. :P

Remember, "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels!"

~Raven

Ana Boot Camp: Day 2 - 500 calories (or less)

Today was actually really hard. It was my mother's birthday. We all went out to eat and there was cake and stuff. I ordered something I knew I didn't like though (Pork chop) and put horse radish on it. I hate horse radish. So I just didn't eat. I instead downed about 6 glasses of water.

Food:
        1/2 Cup of Fat Free Milk : 43 calories
        1/2 Plain Bagel  : 130 calories
        1/2 Cup of Wheaties Cereal : 67 calories
        1 Cup of Kellog's Smore's Cereal : 120 calories

Exercise:
        10 minutes of walking : -52 calories
         
Total calories : 308

I'm keeping track of my weight daily, but I'm not going to post it on here until Saturday. That's going to be my official "weigh-in" day.

~Raven

Ana Boot Camp: Day 1 - 500 calories (or less)

I can't wait to be that thin and to be able to wear clothes like that! Anyways, today was really easy. I slept through breakfast, so that made it even easier. I pretty much skipped lunch, because my mom's dinners are usually fattening and bad. The good thing is, she didn't cook today! That means I skipped breakfast, lunch, and I was able to choose to eat what ever I please!!!!

Food:
        1/2 Cup of Sugar Free Fruit Cocktail : 50 calories
        1 Cup Black Coffee w/ 1 Cream : 6 calories
        1 Tuna Sandwich (1 pickle, 2 pieces of multi-grain bread, no crust, 2 tbsp light mayonnaise 1/2 can of tuna) : 346 calories

Exercise:
        50 minutes of walking : -259 calories
        5 minutes of mowing the lawn : -57 calories
    
Total calories : 86

I went to the mall with my aunt and cousin today as well. I got my hair washed, thinned out, and straightened. I think it looks okay, but I wish it were longer. My cousin got his hair trimmed, dyed black, and straightened. It looks incredible, lucky bastard. My aunt and cousin both got hot dogs while we were there, and I got nothing. :D I had a cup of black coffee and that's it. I hope I am as successful tomorrow as I was today.

Day 1 is complete, 49 days to go. If I can finish all fifty days on this diet, I will have regained control.

Think thin, stay strong.

~Raven           

Ana Boot Camp: Day 0

   

Basically I'm fat. I was diagnosed as anorexic years ago, only to be forced into recovery. I was told and made to push back the little voice in my head telling me I'm fat and to not eat. The problem is that I kept pushing it back and kept eating and eating and not exercising and not exercising some more. I'm now Obese, the one thing I told myself I'd never become. I was morbidly obese 1 month ago, but began doing something about it. I was 291 pounds! If I were ever 300 pounds, I would kill myself. I'm now 280 pounds, which is still a lot. I only lost 11 pounds in 1 month. :( That is why I'm beginning Ana Boot Camp/ABC tomorrow. I remember losing 26 pounds on it when I was anorexic, landing me in hospital, but since I'm a fat cow, I'm sure I won't be in hospital this time and I will most likely lose more than that. I can do this, I need to do this. I can't be fat anymore. I want to be Ana again. I wish to be Ana again! I will be Ana again! My goal is to lose 40 pounds by the end of the ABC. Then I would be where I was 6 months ago at 240 pounds. Can't wait for tomorrow. These are pics of me I took a few minutes ago. Gross I know.